Fourth day and I'm burning out.

We are only four days into 2015 and I already feel exhausted. It's definitely not work because lol I haven't been to work since the 30th, or maybe it is because of work - perhaps I'm craving for workload and stress.

I just spent the entire afternoon reading The Fever by Megan Abbott. I couldn't put it down because I wanted to know the ending, but if I had something else to do, I'd have stopped reading and forgot all about it. It was a thrill for sure, but the first half of the book was way too draggy.

And now, I feel empty. I just cleaned my room and everything's where they are supposed to be, and it's so much cleaner and ... but also so much emptier. Sometimes I appreciate a healthy dosage of messiness.

Maybe I can start on another book? I also have Love Letters To The Dead by Ava Dellaira and the synopsis intrigued me.

Okay, maybe the burnout started on the 1st of January, when my maternal uncle replied my new year wishes with a suggestion for me to find a church (or "home" as he calls it) in 2015 and dedicate a few hours a week embracing God. At that moment in time, I wanted to throw the phone at the wall.

I don't hate my uncle, and I certainly don't hate God.  And I'm quite sure he's asking me to do that because he knows all about the drama in my house.

But, I really hate going to churches. I used to go to a church near my house when I was in primary school, and that was the place where I faced immense prejudice and ostracism. My hair was poofy (like bush like that), I was fat and ugly, and nobody at that church made me feel good about myself. The kids who attended the same Sunday school classes with me were horrible, and the Sunday school teachers were even worse - they always asked for every kid's opinions, but they would always skip my turn. Till now, I still don't know why they did that. It got so bad (one boy said he didn't want to sit next to me because he said I was fat and my hair looked like it had lice) that I started telling lies to my mom to not attend Sunday school. Once I started secondary school, I stopped going.

Ever since then, I rarely visited churches for religious purposes.

And I know that right now, I'm a complete misfit in my family. I'm the only one who does not go to church every week and it irritates me that I have to go to church to prove that I still love God. God has been in my heart ever since I was born and that will never change. I don't announce my love for God constantly, and I don't preach how amazing and wonderful God is on a regular basis, but that does not mean that God is non-existent in my life. I still pray every night before I go to bed, thanking Him for the good things and the lessons from the bad things. It's like I'd rather have my alone time with God than sharing with a lot of people.

My sister goes to church every Saturday and her church friends have become her close friends and I'm sure they were those who influenced her to be more mature as well. Good for her and I'm happy that she found her "home".

But it's just not for me. Some people go through years to learn Bible verses and I completely salute and respect them, but for me, it's simple - I have God in my heart and in my mind, and He will always be my guidance in life.

Ah, I didn't expect this to turn out to be a naggy post about religion. But I feel a little bit better now.

I shall stop now. Don't want to go on and on and on....

Have a good week ahead! :) 

Weekend musings - Laksa and beer

363 Katong Laksa

29B Lorong Liput, Singapore 277740

Nearest MRT: Holland Village (CC Line)

Opening Hours: Daily: 8am - 10pm

Cheat days are awesome. I don't eat super healthily during the weekdays but I try to control what I intake. Once Saturday comes, I go all out and just feast on anything I like without thinking too much. You got to let loose once in a while, right?

Kengyang and I had 363 Katong Laksa yesterday and it was delicious. I dragged Kengyang to this location because I had a few mouthfuls the last time I was here and I was hooked! Poor Kengyang had to eat laksa for dinner when he already had laksa for breakfast, HAHA. True love right there! :D 

After that, we had terrible churros and then it was beer and fries time. We really shouldn't have bought the churros, it wasn't very good and it was a waste of tummy space leh. 

Because we had so much, we walked home from Holland Village. A bit fail because we ended up taking the bus at Pei Hwa Presbyterian School, but ok lah, we walked a good 5+km! After walking, I realised that Holland Village is damn near to my house, like a 7km walk away only. Maybe next time can run there!

My mind is distracted and I want to tell you that I'm loving Focus T25. Only 25 minutes a day (50 minutes on the fifth day of the week) and I feel it working. Everyday I look forward to a session because it really makes me feel more refreshed and awake! Give Focus T25 a try too if you don't want to exercise for a long time but still want to exercise effectively! 

Time for coffee and Murakami. Enjoy your Sunday! :)

Weekend skin pamper (Sunday)

As mentioned in the previous post, I like to tackle my large pores and then rehydrate my skin on Sundays. Since starting on the Innisfree Capsule Recipe Pack Sleeping Mask, I wake up on Sundays with very smooth and moisturised skin, so I don't go crazy for my morning routine. 

At night, I exfoliate and use a volcano mask to get rid of those unsightly large pores around my nose area. Then I'll use a really hydrating face mask before going to sleep. All these steps in the weekends prepare me for the weekdays in which I do only the most basic in terms of skincare. 

Morning

Step 1: SK-II Facial Treatment Gentle Cleanser
Step 2: Michael Todd True Organics Organic Lemon AHA + DHAE Toner
Step 3: The Body Shop Tea Tree Skin Clearing Lotion
Step 4: Innisfree Jejubija Anti-Trouble Spot Essence W

Night

Step 1: Garnier Pure Active Multi-Action Foam
Step 2: SK-II Facial Treatment Gentle Cleanser
Step 3: Michael Todd True Organic Jojoba Charcoal Facial Scrub
Step 4: Michael Todd True Organics Organic Lemon AHA + DHAE Toner
Step 5: Innisfree Super Volcanic Pore Clay Mask
Step 6: Michael Todd True Organics Antioxidant Carrot Multivitamin Serum
Step 7: The Body Shop Tea Tree Blemish Fade Night Lotion
Step 8: Clinique All About Eyes Rich
Step 9: Innisfree Jejubija Anti-Trouble Spot Essence R
Step 10: Innisfree It's Real Bamboo Mask (sometimes Aloe, sometimes Green Tea)

I have been pampering my skin this way for the past 2-3 months and it has really made a difference to my skin condition. I have zero pimples on my skin now and I don't really have uneven skin tone now. Of course, the facials that I have been having helped largely in eliminating those face demons but I only have facials once every 3-4 weeks so maintaining the skin condition in between facials is also very important.

It is quite difficult to commit a good 45 minutes to skincare but I'm even more scared of the difficulty in the future if I don't take care of my skin now. So yes, lai lai weekend pamper!!

Recent reads: Worlds of Tsukuru Tazaki and Tsukiko Omachi

There's something strangely charming about Haruki Murakami's books. Give them to someone new and they wouldn't be able to take the bizarre stories. The first Murakami book that I read was 1Q84 and I remembered thinking how the book was freaking ridiculous. 1Q84 started with a taxi ride on a congested road. That's it. Just a simple taxi ride on a congested road. The more ridiculous the story got, the more I was sucked in into the world of Aomame and Tengo. Ohmy, I really loved that book. I actually had it on my iBooks, but I once was done (I finished reading it at the end of my Japan graduation trip. Very apt.), I decided to get the hard copy for future rereads. After that book, I have purchased almost all of Murakami's works. My favourite currently is Kafka on the Shore. Actually, wait, maybe The Wind-Up Bird Chronicle. 

Hmm. I cannot decide...

The emptiness I get after completing a Murakami book is weirdly addictive. It goes from whatthefuck to self-reflection, and then to contentment. 

So, yes, I purchased Haruki Murakami's latest (number 13!) novel - Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage. As I was browsing bookdepository.com, I saw Strange Weather in Tokyo by Hiromi Kawakami and bought it too - motivated by pure curiosity. 

I have started on Strange Weather in Tokyo and it's surprisingly good. I'm hooked. It's just a book written to amplify two characters' loneliness, but aiyoh just very good lah. 

My experience with Book Depository was not as pleasant as I wanted it to be. The books were definitely cheaper than in stores, but delivery took almost a month. I wanted to get these books for my Copenhagen trip - nope, no such luck. 

Ok, back to Strange Weather in Tokyo!

Have a great weekend guys! :) 

Break time!

I'm taking a break from blogging guys! I'll be back next month!

Enjoy your September! :) 

1000 Calorie Workout Video by FitnessBlender

This long workout video (1 hour and 28 minutes and 42 seconds, WHAT?!) focuses on abs, HIIT cardio, strength and stretching. Today's the first time I'm doing this workout and I could only complete 44 minutes before fast-forwarding to the cool-down and stretching portion. Too freaking intense man. But, I'm quite determined to continue with this workout and hopefully by my 4th/5th time, I'll be able to complete it. 

Note: The creators of this workout advised against doing this workout everyday. 3 times a week is the ideal! I totally understand why man... *in complete exhaustion*

Also, please eat something that gives you a lot of energy an hour before this workout. 2 bananas? I only had pomegranate juice (yay elixir juice sg!) before this and I felt light headed after 40-odd minutes. That was one of the reasons why I stopped too. This feels like Insanity all over again hahaha. I remember I had a heartache after completing my first Insanity workout. Stupid me didn't eat anything substantial before the exercise! 

Ok yes, I hope I can complete at least 50 minutes the next time I try this workout! Huat!!

Off to wash up, beautify myself and yay time for Singapore Night Festival 2014! :) 

Have a great weekend everyone!