Trampoline Self Esteem

I need to stop thinking that everyone is judging me based on how I have changed. It's quite frustrating because now I'm trying to cure a rather serious (in my terms, it's rather serious. According to my sister, it's not that bad) skin problem that was mainly driven by the massive extraction process during my facial sessions.

Now I have tiny bumps appearing all around my face and I'm advised to not go for extractions anymore because now my combination skin has turned into oily/sensitive skin with damaged cells. FML seriously.

I cried about it a fortnight ago, but the situation has been much better now. It's no longer flaring and painful acne everywhere, but more of just tiny bumps that don't hurt. It got so bad two weeks ago that when I smiled, it hurt.

I'm trying to cure it using medicines now but the effect can only be seen slowly. Not what I want, but better than nothing.

I'm just trying to smile it off everyday. What's the point in crying right? Maybe crying will even make it worse (stress and everything)! Might as well just be calm, be normal and laugh it off. I'm quite sure things will be brighter in the near future. Not so soon, but it will come eventually.

My mom even said that she had the exact problems when she was in her early twenties and so if genetics really work, I shouldn't worry so much. She is now approaching 50 and her skin is actually quite impressive - of course all those SKII helped too.

So I have to just pray, laugh and be positive.

Things will be alright soon. I know it.

This post is also a shout-out to my boyfriend who has been the perfect boyfriend all this time. I went to HK still with flaring acne and he didn't comment much about it and even made me think that most of the flares were gone (when they were obviously still there). He was also the ever attentive person who attended to me first in everything before himself. We may not have worked out 4 years ago, but I'm quite sure I want to be with him till forever and ever now. This is so mushy, but I didn't grow up with lots of love, and he is the first person to shower me with generous helpings of love.

I think I'm quite lucky and hence I know things will be fine again soon. Pray, laugh and be positive, Fifi.